Meaning of Rich

To be rich is what many people want. Rich is a word that flashed piles of cash in people's minds, or numerous digit places in their bank account. Yet the word 'rich' has a more general meaning in the dictionary, a meaning of having in great quantity or in abundance, not necesarily always to do with money.

Being rich simply means one can buy the goodies they want, travel and explore new places, raise one's stature and widen social circle and recognition. We want to be rich to indulge in luxury, sensual pleasures and extravagance.
For the less fortunate, getting rich is a way to liberate from the chains of poverty, to break free from the people and environment that they detest.

Having come from a not so well-to-do family myself, I live among neighbors of very similar financial standards. The lack of money not only limit how far we can travel, how big our rooms is, and how much we can eat. More importantly and sadly, it can change a person as well. Take my neighbor for example, we first knew each other when I was around 7 to 8 years old. He was 3 years younger than me. His mother worked very hard everyday to make sure he wouldn't starve. Despite earning only $500 as monthly income, she would buy him his desired toy or game console just to see him happy. But his father, however, wasn't as caring and hardworking as his wife. Hoping to strike rich, he always took shortcuts and would spent constant sums on lotteries and alcohol. Some nights he would return home drunk and angry and yell at his wife whenever she brought up the money issue. There were times he even threatened his wife with a knife, or beat her up. At such a young age, my neighbor would cry out loud in fear.

Many years later, his mother and him decided to put an end to this and eventually left the apartment secretly for good. After they left, his husband's became mentally ill and some time later, rumors broke out that he passed away. Since, I lost contact with my neighbor and never saw him again.

This incident taught me one crucial lesson- Lack of understanding and greed is a bigger problem than poverty.

If only my neighbor's father would show more concern and work hard, even if his income was not very ideal, his wife and son would be more than contented. Because of his idleness, his wife's became angry easily for being unappreciated.

Reality- The False Image

In this world, people strive to be rich, to be attractive, to be loved, to be recognized, to be excited by thrills and external fascinations. Out of these, superficial beauty is a major topic. Because of beauty, people want to be rich, because of beauty, the world is made a more colourful and exciting place for us.

Whether it's the style in fashion, the spectacular CG graphics in movies or the beautiful celebrities' faces, people love them and are so attached to them, that they in time have become the norm of our daily society.

But beauty is not always as glamourous as it appears to be.

Let me sidetrack a bit and share a little of my story. Like most people, I used to study in primary and secondary schools before I go on to pursuing my digital media dream in polytechnic. But still, the most memorable times come from the school days, especially during later stage of primary school and secondary school. I wasn't really an outspoken boy in nature, and naturally I wasn't very popular among the girls, and my friends were very limited but truthful. Maybe it was a blessing too. Observing from a quiet side, I realize how the good looking students were tormented by their own more appealing exterior. For girls, the abundant attention from the world made them more conscious of their exterior appearances. Aware and enjoying the attention, they would do their best to ensure their outlook is never compromised. They soon become over indulgent on the admiration of others, and lose their mind lose stability easily simply because they depend too much on the opinions of others. But the lust of sight is not something reliable and often unforgiving. Although being beautiful can really boost one's confidence, it can also arise insecurity in one's heart and mind and even cause one to lose direction once that beauty is affected.

In short, beauty and appearance are like a blurred glass blinding people from seeing one another's true being/existence. Today, most divorces and problems of love relationships stem from the oblivion of this truth.

Relating to this issue, there was this story I read about a madman during the time when the Buddha lived. According to the story, there was this man who fell in love with the reflection of his face in the mirror. But this greatly agonized him, for once he looked away from the mirror, his face would disappear from his sight. Anxiously, he would run around town asking people if anyone had seen his beloved face. And thus he was called the mad man of his town, for his face have always been with him, just that he couldn't see it because his eyes, being part of his face could never see it without a mirror. And for this reason, he was ignorant of the fact the reflection of his face was caused by his own head.

Back to the effects of beauty, many of us are actually very alike to this mad man. We don't know that the source of happiness lies with our minds. Unable to see this, we are so ready to place the responsibility of our happiness on these fleeting sensations and our accomplishments in life.

Due to the fast paced working life, we tend to forget this fact. But for the rest of the journey to finding happiness, this truth would be your key foundation and your crucial first step.

What is True Happiness?

Before we answer this question, we should ask ourselves this question instead- What is unhappiness?

Yes, this truly is the case, because as long as we are unhappy about something, the way to happiness can never really be found.

So, what makes us unhappy? We are unhappy when we are unable to have the things we want, the experience we desire and crave. Let's say if this is the case, then let's start with a list of the most common and timelessly acclaimed factors that cause unhappiness in the modern society we live in. Also note that the stated examples are actual scenarios I have observed from real people around me.

1. Money- e.g. An average salaryman works 5 1/2 days a week to earn enough money for proper meals and bills to sustain his family. Even though he doesn't like his job, he leaves home for work early daily , returns late and exhausted at night. With the little spare time, he spends it hanging out with friends, to numb frustrations of work or drink his heart out.
2. Love- e.g. A thoughtful girl who loves her boyfriend deeply feels he no longer understands and pampers her as much as he used to when they first started out dating. Their conversation topics thinned, and the simplest of questions from her would even annoy him sometimes. She sobbed in silence, and faced the dilemma whether she should leave or stay the relationship.
3. Social Stress- e.g. A girl, born with a generally less attractive exterior tries hard to blend in with the group. But no matter how hard she tries, the attention and favor of her friends naturally turn to her other better looking friends. Under their company, she begins to feel extremely left out and lonely.
   
4. Health- e.g. A young and happy family man suddenly became strickened with kidney failure. Day by day his strength fails and the pain worsens. To seek treatment, he spends more money and time at the hospital than with his own family. From an optimistic man, he became downcast and sees little meaning in his life.

One may think that happiness varies from person to person, which is true. But in general, happiness can be categorized into 2 very broad types:

1. Happiness of Obtaining
2. Happiness of Foregoing

To start, let's look at the first kind- Happiness of Obtaining. This type of happiness is more intense, the type that most people seek and define to be the true meaning of happiness. It basically refers to the happiness of having something you want. Yet at the same time, it is also the mirror of intense unhappiness that weigh down many people today, leading to stress problems and in worse cases, depression and extreme anxiety. Simply put, it is the other side to Happiness gained from Obtaining.


The second type of happiness is rarer and harder to obtain, one that very few people can relate or understand. It is the happiness of letting go of your desires by thoroughly understanding their true underlying nature. This joy comes genuinely from your heart.

Zen- Mind over Matter

No matter how the landscapes and architectures of the world changes, unhappiness would always linger in the world of Man. This unhappiness is not the work of trees, not the work of mountains, or anything that has long existed before us. This unhappiness comes from our minds. Yes, because of the mind, 'we' exist, along with the 'world' within it. Through our different perceptions, each of our world takes on a different look.

For example, a person who grew up in a broken family would most likely take on a more pessimistic view of the world and life than someone from a nurtured family because of the different experiences they have. The two of them might live on the extreme ends of the world and not know the existences of each other, but their lives still go on. Suppose the both of them were to write down their life accounts on their own diaries. And one day, a child, curious to know more about life, finds both diaries and reads them. In this case, which story should he trust to be his life in future? Should it be the pessimist's or the optimist's account?

None of the two would be the real answer, for no one's thinking and philosophy is exactly the same, not to mention the events we would face in life, the paths we would walk, the people we would meet, and the choices we would make. Then again, there are always a lot of things to be learnt from others' experiences, but we must always understand that the problems and solutions in our individual lives are special and different from others.

Only we can solve our own problems.

No Shortcuts to True Happiness

Yes, taking shortcuts would only result in temporary and unstable happiness. No matter how steady your means of happiness are, they are not invulnerable. Be it money, love, or accomplishments. Why? Because they are still, in essence, based on external factors and conditions. They are never part of us. Nevertheless, there are many who choose to ignore this fact, and indulge themselves in such luxuries as long as they can, like someone who rely on drugs to ease himself.

This is why I decided to set up this blog, so not only can I share my insights with anyone, more crucially, anyone can share their opinions and experiences with me and other readers of the site. Of all the advanced subjects, finding true happiness in life is by far the hardest, more challenging even than Maths and Science, merely because there are no clear formulas to instantly bring you to the shrouded goal called true happiness.

As you can see, I bolded the words above. ''no clear formulas''. But that does not mean there is no formula at all. As problems are defined according to the mind, so are the solutions.

Conclusion

Problems stem from ourselves, our minds, our demands and ideals. Always remember that. I believe that many people know this, but still, they couldn't put an end to their own troubles. Problems still bug them everyday. Because knowing isn't enough. We need to dig deep into our other mind, the part we have failed to understand and have long lost sight and control of it. Worse still, some people see that part of their minds as who they really are and let it control them, making them act rashly and commit things that cause much hurt to others as well as to themselves in the long run.

To everyone who is facing great pain and sorrow in life at this very second, pls do not give up. What you face is beyond anyone could express, I know, and there are even times when there's no one who seems to understand or pay attention to you. Hang in there.

No problem can outwin or outlast you because your mind and soul are never bound to these problems from the day you came into this world. They were born after you and thus should cease before you.